Draw Breath

...a trip to Mount Argus.

Apparently Charles (sadly not Charles J.) used his saintly magic to cure "perforated, gangrenous appendicitis with generalized peritonitis that was multi-organically compromising and included extenuating and prolonged agony."

I can't find out whether the miraculous cure took place in the 19^th Century, in which case I'd hazard a kidney-stone, or in the last number of years, in which case my guess might get me sued (and what a fun case that would be). But there you have it. At least people will be vaguely social democratic and polite where I'm going.

Update: The crucial cure apparently took place in 1999. Lots of witnesses, so the conspiracy to defraud theory is probably not wise. Still, let's just say that I'll take a shrug of the shoulders and "it's just one of those strange things" over an imaginary friend theory any day.